One-On-One Fun With the Youngest One

Though we miss Emma while she is at preschool, she absolutely loves it there. She has told me, “Mommy, I don’t cry at preschool because I am so happy there.” So, it is without guilt that Lily and I very much enjoy our chance for one-on-one time while big sister is having the time of her life. There are definitely mornings when I clean the house, do laundry, run errands, and generally try to catch up when I have one sweet monkey here instead of two, but then there are the other mornings, the ones when it is Lily’s time. We read, we play, and we find out who Lily is without a big sister around. They are sweet friends and great playmates, but it is nice to know what Lily likes to do when there is no one to follow or to negotiate toy rights with, no one to influence her or to answer questions before Lily gets a chance. Though Emma has been a very kind big sister the vast majority of the time, it can be tough always being littler, trying to keep up in a much smaller body. When Lily and I are alone, she doesn’t try to keep up. She just is. And I get to watch that, and I get to smile. I feel like this one-on-one time gives Lily the best of both worlds…a big sister who is a lot of fun to learn from and time alone with Mommy to giggle and grow. I think Lily’s favorite activity is our Music Together class with Teacher Donna. She squeals with delight, claps with the music, walks around, and joins in with some of the words and sounds. She is absolutely joyful while we are there, and she beams much of the time. If you even mention Teacher Donna’s name, she starts singing “Hu-llo,” slapping her hands on her legs like we do in the opening song, and making funny sounds on her lips just like Teacher Donna does. We have fun at home, too. This morning, Lily spent at least fifteen minutes just rocking her favorite baby, which happens to be Emma’s baby. She cuddled her and smiled at her, caring for her with such a warm motherly touch that it kept me from laughing at the fact that the doll is truly almost as big as Lily is. She “fed” me from the play dishes from the play kitchen. We read together as she confidently told me the animal sounds and eagerly listened to her books. She soaked up the mommy time, the cuddles, the sweet stillness of a quiet house. Even when we are alone, though, she is still independent. When her nose got messy, she blew it herself, and when her diaper needed changing, she told me. I marvel sometimes at how young she has been when she has wanted to feed herself, blow her nose, brush her teeth, wash her hands, play with the “big girl” toys. She answers "yeah" or "no" to questions with absolute conviction. She asks for her snack, crawls up the stairs to get it, and opens the pantry door with a request for “cracker” or “puff puff” or occasionally goes to the buffet to hand me a piece of fruit. Though I think she was born to have a certain personality, a confidence about her, she has also been formed by the necessity of not having everything done for her instantly. Being a second child can be a challenge, but it can also be a gift. She has learned to use her voice and to figure things out by watching others. She has learned to share and work out deals with another child, to know that the world doesn’t revolve only around her, but that she is so important to our family, and she is absolutely one of the most important parts of our world. I give thanks that Lily is exactly who she is…who she was born to be, who she is because she was the second child born to our family, who she is still becoming in the moments when she watches me, observes her sister, gets swung around by her adoring daddy, makes her own choices and decisions no matter what the rest of us like to do. I am so happy that I get a chance to just be with her sometimes, to interact with her in a way that is only possible one-on-one, to give her undivided attention. Then, I am absolutely thrilled when our family of four can be together again, to learn from each other, love on each other, and play together. For in my eyes, there is nothing like a mommy, daddy, and two little girls having a family dance party, giggling all at the same time, sharing the joy of family togetherness. I like to think that Lily has the best of both worlds…a noisy house full of love and quiet moments filled with mommy time, and I think the world of the blessing that is for both of us.